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Anyone who has flown in the last 50 years or so has heard the safety mantra for the oxygen masks that will fall from the ceiling if you lose cabin pressure: Secure your own mask before helping others around you. That is a great sentiment.

But in the upheaval of recent years’ anxious, unprecedented days, with lockdowns, losses, and logistics that changed every daily routine, our “oxygen masks” seemed stuck in the ceiling or darting around avoiding our grasp. When our families are counting on us, we can’t afford to get stuck feeling helpless. Here are some ways to get our hearts right so we can help our families adapt when we’re feeling helpless ourselves.

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